Absurd News Stories

#1 Alumna Sues College Because She Hasn’t Found a Job

Really, You are going to sue your school because they didn’t automatically get you a job? That is just absurd, that’s the schools job to do. I find two quotes really telling:

As Thompson sees it, any reasonable employer would pounce on an applicant with her academic credentials, which include a 2.7 grade-point average and a solid attendance record.

Solid attendance record? That’s one of your selling points? I actually went to class that I was paying for so you should give me a job.

They favor more toward students that got a 4.0. They help them more out with the job placement.

I wonder why that is?

#2 LenDale White Loses 30 Pounds this offseason

The running back for the Tennessee Titians came into camp last week in what he called the best shape of his life and when asked how he did his response was:

It wasn’t a lot of major diet changes. (It was) watching what I drink. I was a big Patron consumer. … That’s what it was. I was drinking a lot, drank a lot of alcohol. I cut that out of my diet all the way. I don’t drink at all. I cut the drinking, I stopped drinking for six months.

Sounds reasonable enough. I heard a funny analysis of this on the radio yesterday that I found very funny.

1) Assuming 70 calories in a shot of Patron

2)  3500 calories in a pound of fat

3) Assume the only change he made was not drinking Patron for those six

And to lose 30 pounds over 6 months that works out to about 6 shots a day. I guess he was living large.

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One response to “Absurd News Stories

  1. The thing I rally love about the woman suing the school is her actual legal complaint. She misspells a good number of words. I wouldn’t be surprised if her resume had similar errors.

    Also, evidently she expected the career services office to call employers and tell them to call her to ask for interviews. Clearly my expectations for my own job search are way out of line.

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